Today was a massive ego blow.
I entered a Magic the Gathering tournament and got my ass handed to me. The rules of said tourney were that everyone got 6 new booster packs (6 packs X 15 cards each) and 30 minutes to create a deck right then and there.
Granted, I didn’t expect to do supremely well. I just wanted it to be fun.
My first opponent was a nice guy. He helped me rebuild my deck and gave me some pointers. However, he was also nice enough to let me know that everyone (mostly the Pro players in the room) immediately judged me and discussed how “she would have a really hard time.”
One thing I’m really compulsive about is the perpetuation of stereotypes. I beat myself up extra hard if I make a driving error because, hey, look, female Asian driver does it again.
Being a shitty driver upsets me because I know I make mistakes. However, winning one of five rounds with everyone thinking I was going to suck anyway is horribly painful.
I’m not very good at a lot of things.
In fact, I can only successfully brag about being great at Bust A Move/ Puzzle Booble.
I just didn’t want to be that “idiot nerd girl” today.
The one who doesn’t really know about video games and just plays Farmville. The one who pretends that she’s read all of the X-men comics even if she’s only seen the films. I didn’t want to be that girl who tagged along with her guy friends and played Dungeons and Dragons but wasn’t actually good because she’d never played anyone else.
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- jazzyman24 said:The fact that you went into the torney without any great expectations, just wanting to have fun was very admirable; I don’t think I would be brave enough to do that! :) And all “pros” start off as beginners. The other players shouldn’t be so haughty.
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- helloiamkelly said:awhh willa :( make a comeback and kick their asses!! roarr!
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